Reyns Gems
Dear Santa,
I know I’ve been a bad boy this year. 5-7 and not a bowl game in sight. I know you’re always complaining about the cold up there but you should see how long of a winter it’s going to be down here as well.
Enclosed is my Christmas list.
P.S. In no particular fashion.
1) Tell the numbskull scheduling our non-conference games to lay off the Florida State’s, Miami’s, Georgia’s, LSU’s, and West Virginia’s for awhile. Instead, give me some more Division One, Subdivision teams. Wait…no, bad idea.
2) Let the growth fairy touch my son this offseason.
3) Clone Mason Crosby and allow me to recruit him.
4) Allow the NCAA to consider moving us to the Mountain West Conference.
5) Have Bob Stoops bolt for Miami and replace him with Ryan Leaf.
6) Have Mack Brown bolt for the NFL and replace him with Slick Rick.
7) If I can’t get the Mason clone, eliminate field goals in college football.
8) Clone Kordell Stewart (prior to turning gay).
9) Bring back the old football jerseys.
10) Bring back Gary Barnett as a consultant for the day we play Texas in the Big 12 Championship.
11) Leave me some offensive lineman (I only have so many you know).
12) Design an offseason workout program for Darrell Scott.
13) Teach Josh Smith to take a knee, 8-yards deep in the end zone.
14) Clone Rashaan Salam (prior to the drug addiction)
15) Make Notre Dame good again, so we can beat them in the national championship.
16) Bless the state of Colorado with one decent recruit who isn’t a offensive lineman.
17) Clone Jordan Dizon (prior to 0-15 Lions)
18) Let Boise State have at least one terrible season (8-4 comes to mind) to boast my self-esteem a little.
19) Install Folsom with blue turf.
20) Clone Ray Carruth (prior to murder).
Keywords: Buffaloes, College., Dan Hawkins, NCAA Football, University of Colorado
